Christmas Corporate Gift Baskets

Nobody likes paperwork. That much was obvious. When the boss asked for volunteers to work on it, no hands went up. He even tried to bribe the staff with Christmas corporate baskets, but there are no takers. Everyone likes holiday gift baskets, that’s not the problem. They especially love the holiday gift baskets with wine, but no hands went up.

It’s not the holiday gift baskets ideas that are the problem. It’s the paperwork. No one is going to choose to do it no matter what is in those delightful holiday gift baskets. Cheese doesn’t matter, wine, no thanks, cookies, I’ll get my own. Holiday gift baskets for families are not the way to their hearts.

What everyone does like is winning holiday gift baskets. They proved that at the last holiday party. There was a raffle for holiday gift baskets with wine, three of them – sold out before the party even started. They all got small holiday gift baskets for families to attend, but you couldn’t leave one on the table unattended because someone would steal it. No, the baskets were not the problem. It was definitely the paperwork.

The boss was at his wit's end. He couldn’t believe there were no volunteers. Christmas corporate gift baskets almost always get their hands up. He used holiday gift baskets to coerce Sally into going to that conference for him. And it turned out to be a real snooze feast. She complained so much he gave her extra holiday gift baskets with wine just to shut her up.

Not this time, though. No takers, no matter how many holiday gift baskets ideas he threw out there. It wasn’t the holiday gift baskets. He would have to think outside the Christmas holiday gift baskets box this time or do the paperwork himself. That wasn’t going to happen.

It was already clear that all the luxury corporate gift baskets in the world were not going to get these deadbeats to do paperwork. The boss needed a new plan. He needed to combine the best luxury corporate baskets he could find with an office-wide hangman competition. The winners walk away with luxury gift baskets, and the loser does paperwork.

It seemed like a foolproof plan. Well, it should have been. Luxury gift baskets make great prizes, and it gets the paperwork done, so what could go wrong? He already had the best luxury gift baskets in his office; all he needed to do was put together the game. He would make flyers explaining the game, including the luxury corporate gift prizes.

He was pretty sure they would love the idea. Nobody likes to do paperwork, but everyone loves corporate give basket ideas. The luxury corporate gifts would be enough to draw them in. He was sure of it. He sat down, pulled out a piece of paper and a marker, and made the flyer. “Best luxury gift baskets,” he wrote in large letters. This was going to work.

He handed out the flyers and watched the buzz around the office. Everyone once in a while, he would hear someone whisper, “best corporate gift baskets ever.” He knew they were hooked. To draw them in a little further, he handed each one a small assortment of edible corporate gifts as a tease. They are truly unique gift baskets; he promised as they took the bait.

Before he knew it, they asked if they could help set up the game. “Sure, why not.” He gave them a few instructions and a couple more edible corporate gifts as motivation, then sat down to pick the perfect word for the game. He didn’t want to make it too easy, but, on the other hand, he didn’t want to be here all day, either. He popped open one of the gourmet gift baskets as he sat and thought about the word he wanted to use. Maybe it could be a phrase, something like best corporate gift baskets? Perhaps that was too easy. They were not that stupid. A few of them were kind of dense, but it was an intelligent group for the most part.

Everyone sat at attention with their hangman papers in front of them and a few unique corporate gifts for nourishment, and the game began. At the front of the room was a larger version of the hangman and a few corporate gifts for employees sitting next to it. The boss went around the room, getting guesses for letters and adding them if they were right. If wrong, the guesser got to pick a part of the hangman to add on his paper. The boss looked over at Bob’s hangman and noticed it was a little more detailed than most. I guess he really wants these unique corporate gift baskets, he thought to himself.

He also noticed the others were filling in the word pretty quickly. Bob and one other guy were the only ones who were struggling. “I got it,” he heard from the back of the room. The boss walked over and looked at Andrea’s paper. She had it. “Go grab yourself the biggest of the customized corporate gifts, Andrea. Nice job. There are five more unique corporate gifts to go. Who is going home with one of those corporate gift baskets with logo, and who is staying to do paperwork?”

After about an hour, most people had guessed the word and picked up their corporate gifts for employees as a reward. There were two players left and just one of the unique gift baskets left. “Who is it going to be, I wonder? What is your next guess, Bob?” “What about a Z?” The boss just stared at him and laughed. “No, Z, I’m afraid. Steve, what is your letter? Remember, these are the best custom gift baskets on the market.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Steve answered. “I love unique gift baskets. Everyone knows that…how about a Q?” The boss shook his head. “You guys are making this harder than it needs to be. Lots of good, common sense letters left, and I know you want one of those unique holiday gift baskets.” As he was walking back toward Bob, he noticed his hangman. So far, he didn’t even have a face, just one eye. The boss reached into one of the open unique gift baskets and grabbed a candy.

“Bob, what are you doing? Your man should be just about dead by now, but you haven’t even completed his face? I can’t give you one of the best custom gift baskets unless you win.” “Oh, I know. I’m just adding a little more detail to my guy than the others did. I’m an artist, you know. Remember, that’s how I won the last batch on corporate gift baskets for employees. I drew the best picture. I have every intention of winning one of those unique gift baskets this time, too.”

“Wait,” Steve yelled as he jumped off his chair and walked over to Bob. “He can’t do that? He is going to win corporate gifts by cheating?” “I’m not cheating. I plan to win one of the corporate gifts for employees fair and square. The rule said nothing about how to draw the man hanging.” Steve looked up at the boss just as he was starting to realize his mistake. “I should have made some rules, I guess,” he said before popping another candy from one of the corporate gift baskets for clients in his mouth.

He shrugged. There are only 26 letters in the alphabet. How long can he go? “Two can play at that game,” Steve responded with a huff. “Suddenly, I’m feeling very artistic, too. I think my guy needs a few hundred buttons on his shirt. How about that? You are not going to steal from me. I am a regular at all the luxury corporate gifting companies. I know exactly what is at stake.” “Do what you want,” Bob said without even looking Steve’s way. “I'll still win the corporate gifts.”

The boss had a sinking feeling as the day ended with no winner. He moved the corporate gift baskets back into his office. “I guess we will start fresh tomorrow,” Everyone groaned as they piled out the door heading for home with their office gift baskets. The boss shook his head as he watched them leave. “It was the perfect plan. It was my execution that was lacking.” He grabbed a few gift baskets for office staff and went home. He took the paperwork with him.

“I guess I lose.”